Putting Doubts to Rest!

How do you close the book on doubts, how do you lay doubts to rest? A few days ago, I came home from a long day at work and had a detailed chat with my mother about recurring doubts I've been experiencing lately. Everyone handles doubts differently, some people like myself prefer to speak to their loved ones to gain a perspective or share some light on personal experiences. You can understand the term "sharing is caring", but rewind for a second, that doesn't mean we share all. Others prefer to keep their thoughts to themselves  and handle their issues the best way they know-how which can be a challenge at times, but that's not to say they can't overcome and move forward.

My doubts are starting a new role and questioning myself if I'm ready to take the plunge and start again, where am I going to be in the next year or even the year after that, am I doing the right thing by leaving my current position and is it the right position for me as I have another field I am passionate about.

I have come to realise it's perfectly normal to have these strong feelings of doubts and natural to admit them out loud. Confronting your fear or doubt is the first stage, the next stage is how to overcome the fear, self-doubt and rise above the problem. When I looked into the full description of doubts, according to google the word Doubts is a feeling of uncertainty or lack of conviction. It can also be an encouraging voice in your head which can awaken those thoughts and force you to address them. However, I've decided to  address my doubts and say them out loud.

The advice my mother gave me was very positive and straightforward, she said "if you show the doubt on your face, the new employer will think twice. You need to go in there and show what you can do, you have already done the hard part, you know your strengths, now it's time to challenge yourself further and expand your knowledge, at the end of the day you have gained a skill. Don't lose it, now is the time to seize the opportunity you have been given".

After the long chat, I felt better and realised I allowed my self-doubt to take over my emotions and instead I should be praising the opportunity that has been given to me, so I said NO, NO, NO, enough is enough. All you can do is your best and I finally feel that I'm making the right decision by starting a new position. Thinking about what is going to happen in a year's time is too far, at this point, it's best to concentrate on what's happening now in front of me and in terms of another field I am passionate about, I've decided to enrol myself into an online course in the subject to gain an inside view of what it entails. 

I've always been a firm believer in pursuing research first before you tackle the project. From what I have mentioned, I feel I have put my doubts to bed and can finally move forward. Don't get me wrong the inner voices may return, but I believe there is a positive outcome which will allow you to change those doubts into positive solutions.

Living My Best Life and Making Time for Interests

Well, it's officially the 2nd day of Septemeber, ask yourselves where has August gone? For me, August has always been an exciting month of the year as we get a hint of an amazing heatwave, your preparing yourself for a summer holiday you've been waiting for months, some of us wear less clothing, I say some of us just in case your fighting with the aircon in your office like myself, but on the upside, there is also a dash of rain to cool us down and lets not forget the plants do need watering lol.

On the other hand, it has not stopped myself and my companion gallivanting across London having fun. We live on the momentum of enjoying one's self and living life to the fullest. Since August began, I have been up and out, such as going on a holiday to Portugal, coming back and throwing myself into work, spending nearly every other waken weekend busy and socialising. It can be a struggle at times, because when does the day of relaxation appear.

Only a week and a half ago we all experienced a glorious bank holiday weekend with my loved ones at Notting Hill Carnival and nothing but the amazing weather to make it perfect. Some people spent the time with their families, went on trips, I attended the event and covered head to toe in watered-down chocolate following a carnival truck (float), living my best life. 

It's not everyone's cup of tea but I believe its always good to experience things and why not dance in the street, its the one time of the year, that's if you can make the time but I wasn't alone my companions were there as well with mixtures of drinks galore in our rucksacks and embracing the joyous sound of Caribbean music from steel pans, various sound systems and the beautiful vibrant colours of the carnival trucks riding along as they pass through the streets of Notting Hill and Ladbroke Grove. I couldn't ask for a blessed weekend.

Now that I have the time to relax and put my feet up, I feel its the time to get back to my writing which I love to do. Sometimes I have to ask myself why haven't I made the conscious effort to take an hour or 2 and motivate my time to put my fingers to work on that keyboard, because I thoroughly believe once I get going, I can't stop, I'm on a roll. 

In the past, I have found myself hitting upon the same issue of not having distant material to write about or the motivation has been lost. Why do I find myself asking this question like you can hear the self-doubt in my voice, but what I have realised is it's ok to have doubts but don't let it come between your passion of wanting to do something worth it. 

Take risks and seize the day as people say. You only have one life and I can honestly say I choose to live it. Take the time to make room to fit your interests in your daily schedule, gaining that confidence to say out loud its ok to have doubts, now that I have self-awareness of the issue, the next step for this month is not to give a damn about what I write, just write what I feel and hopefully everything should flow naturally.